Well, I went up to Hot Springs with weekend to plant for BABE. Little did I know what EVIL plans were waiting for me!

As you all know, the night I stayed with the Little Foxes, they publicly humiliated me and trapped me in there. It took me most of the night to carve a hole big enough with the Speedball tool I had to escape.

After escaping I ran to Mountainscorpia’s house for refuge. There was a note on the door that I was going to have a roommate. Mountainscorpia had mentioned a writer friend in town so I assumed it was her. After going inside I discovered it was Wanda from Wanda and Pete! Well, that seemed pretty cool. Everyone seemed very excited about our plans to go hiking and planting the following day. That was before I learned of their true intentions.

It seems that some vicious rumor started that I tend to hike people into the ground and practice the Pirate Code on the trail (those that fall behind get left behind).
*hmm… some of those pesky hiking partners did make it back… *

Anyway, it seems that SOMEONE got it in their head that apparently I needed to indulge in a little humble pie, since Wanda rather eagerly (a bit too eagerly) volunteered to help me plant. Then Wanda and Mountainscorpia decided that Mountainscorpia should not hike the trail that Wanda picked out for us since she was needed to pick us up at the other end. Stupidly, I didn’t see how this all was coming together. You would think that Mountainscorpia quickly speeding off (smelled the rubber) and leaving only the two of us stranded on what was a long hike would have clued me in. Or the fact that Wanda was confident we didn’t need a map (she hiked it before). But, no, I was sure this wouldn’t be a problem. Wanda said it was only 4 miles and all downhill and she knew the way.

I started to hike up and up and realized this was not downhill. I also found out later it wasn’t just 4 miles…

As soon as the car peeled away, I had to race to keep up with Wanda. I figured it was just an initial burst of excited energy and trotted after her. And surely, the trail would start sloping down any minute now… any minute now…

After a mile later, I was huffing and puffing with the relentless climb and the distance between Wanda and I was growing. I figured that we had to at least stop to plant a box and I could catch my breath then. But when I desperately tried to yell that I found a good spot, she said it was too soon to plant or the spot wasn’t good enough or something and never broke her pace! I then realized that I had no map and no way back and Wanda was leaving me in the dirt!! Something was wrong! Then Wanda started taunting me! The jig was up! The two of them had to have planned this all along! Who put them up to this? Cursed Rebel Alliance!

I desperately crawled and struggled up the mountain and forced myself to continue for miles and miles. I had to keep Wanda in sight some how! Thankfully, her red coat and umbrella were highly visible through the still leafless trees even though she was far into the distance.

Then at the bottom I noticed the get away car! Even if I made it out, could I make it to the car in time? Just when everything seemed hopeless, I glimpsed a sliver of red on the ground. Wanda had dropped her umbrella! I snatched it up, flipped it open, and glided down the mountain using a Mary Poppins maneuver!

I landed just behind Wanda in a desperate race to get to the car! Wanda had the lead and managed to make it there first, but luckily her partner in crime had fallen asleep! With the hikers sitting nearby (witnesses), the two of them took me in the car and acted as though nothing had happened. I was too tired to even protest much—I may have just blacked out then.

The following morning I raced to my car only to find a FLAT tire! Hmmm… wonder who did that?! Seems I remember one of them evilly cackling that I should WALK home.

All I can say is, payback is h*ll.

FYI: For any newbies that don't know about Wanda of Wanda and Pete, Wanda has thru hiked the AT and other trails a gazillon times! She also has over 10,000 finds. The woman doesn't stop!

Well, the only thing I have to say in my own defense, is that while I really tried to publicly humiliate you ..... I couldn't get the Public to show up, thanks to someone telling me they were going to arrive around midnight. So photos had to be a poor substitute. Luckily a picture is worth a thousand words - lol!!

And the rest of the story sounds pretty on the money to me - if it ain't true, it oughta be... ;-))

Mama Fox

What a great story for a Monday morning !!! This will make me chuckle all day..... and I need that on Monday during furniture market time. WHEW

First....the trauma in the outhouse..... then.....
We met Wanda and Pete. Nice folks.... but I really have NO problem believing MOST of your story !!!

Thanks for sharing.

GIGGLE

Note to self:

Stay on good side of the NC mountain folk !

:O)

Great story...LMAO!

FYI: For any newbies that don't know about Wanda of Wanda and Pete, Wanda has thru hiked the AT and other trails a gazillon times! She also has over 10,000 finds. The woman doesn't stop!

Isn't Wanda A HOOT! I'm glad I got to meet her in Gatlinburg. Sounds like you two had a day to remember. Glad I wasn't there.

...is that she left behind - for me to plant - some boxes that - how can I say this? - could probably get me arrested if found on my person during a routine traffic stop.

MS

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Who put them up to this? Cursed Rebel Alliance!

Ummm, nope! Wish it had been us--really, REALLY do--but it wasn't.

Ah, if only half of your heavily embroidered tale is true, I can be happy today.

Knit Wit

...is that she left behind - for me to plant - some boxes that - how can I say this? - could probably get me arrested if found on my person during a routine traffic stop.

MUHAHAHAHA!
*hoping she didn't notice that I moved the "naughty" boxes into the backseat where they are more easily discovered*

*hmm… some of those pesky hiking partners did make it back… *

Well, can't pretend I actually kept up or anything... but didn't FreeBird beat you back to your truck last fall?

Wanda said it was only 4 miles and all downhill and she knew the way.

I started to hike up and up and realized this was not downhill. I also found out later it wasn’t just 4 miles…

Now this story I will share... but not right away. I'll wait until Joan and I are hiking one of the trails in McDowell, and she makes her normal comment about needing to be a mountain goat. Might make her feel better. 8))

but didn't FreeBird beat you back to your truck last fall?

Hmmm... nope, don't seem to recall it that way at all. Then again, probably Mountainscorpia and Wanda remember a bit different version of the weekend-- but I posted first so I win! Isn't that how it's supposed to work? ;)

but I posted first so I win! Isn't that how it's supposed to work? ;)

Nope. Posting first just gives them rebuttal opportunities... now they get to "correct" the story.

Especially on this board. 8))

Nope. Posting first just gives them rebuttal opportunities... now they get to "correct" the story.

Hmmm... looks like WalkinOrange is volunteering for the next Wanda workout session...

Darth Wolf

Hmmm... looks like WalkinOrange is volunteering for the next Wanda workout session...

Just because of timing it's not likely, but not impossible either. It would depend on when, where and how much advance warning I got. Knowing up front that I probably wouldn't keep up unless someone let me, I would at least try to have a map and compass with me so I could figure out how to get back.

Trail? We don't need no steenking trail... I'm getting lost on the harder courses now! 8))

Knowing up front that I probably wouldn't keep up unless someone let me, I would at least try to have a map and compass with me so I could figure out how to get back.

That would be a very, very good idea.

DW:

I then realized that I had no map and no way back and Wanda was leaving me in the dirt!!

WO:

I would at least try to have a map and compass with me so I could figure out how to get back.

DW:

That would be a very, very good idea.

Hey, Knit Wit! Does this mean that Wolf in Sheeps Clothing comes with a soundtrack?

8))

Were did you guys go, how long a hike was that bad boy,!!!Sounds like A GREAT HIKE to me..cant wait to meet Ms Wanda and Pete, sound like good folks.

Were did you guys go, how long a hike was that bad boy,!!!Sounds like A GREAT HIKE to me..cant wait to meet Ms Wanda and Pete, sound like good folks.

Wanda introduced me to the AT.
GO to BABE, Free bird! Wanda will be there (but she will have done all the boxes then), and you can experience first hand the trail we did. There are 4 boxes we planted there and a box on either end of the trail from others (though one may be missing).

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Wolf in Sheeps Clothing comes with a soundtrack?

You think banjo music would be appropriate?

You think banjo music would be appropriate?

Hadn't really thought about it. But now that you mention it... YES!

It even ties in with the rafting at USNWC. 8))

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It even ties in with the rafting at USNWC. 8))

You are SO bad.... ROFL

You think banjo music would be appropriate?

Hadn't really thought about it. But now that you mention it... YES!

It even ties in with the rafting at USNWC. 8))

Hmmm... I'm starting to wonder about the real reason Knit Wit invited me to come hiking to do the Deliverance box with her...