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Read Thread: Most embarrassing moment?

Re: Most embarrassing moment?
Board: Kid Shenanigans
Reply to: #657210 by LuLaHe
Nov 22, 2011 3:51pm
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My husband...

My 2.5 year old daughter...

In the change room at the public pool...

"Nice penis, Daddy. Can I smell it?"
Re: Most embarrassing moment?
Board: Kid Shenanigans
Reply to: #657210 by LuLaHe
Nov 22, 2011 4:40pm
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My son has had this stuffed monkey from Build a Bear since he was a baby. He loves it and always had it close. When he was about 3 I saw him playing a bit rough with it and asked him what he was doing. He replied that he was spanking his monkey.

And just today my 2 year old DD overheard me and DH talking about something dumb that happened (I can't even remember what) and she yells out "daah" really loud. A sound I make often to make fun of something really stupid I or someone else does. Great.
Re: Most embarrassing moment?
Board: Kid Shenanigans
Reply to: #657210 by LuLaHe
Nov 22, 2011 5:02pm
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Many years ago, when my (now ex) husband was taking a job transfer to another state, his future boss took our family out to dinner after a day of house hunting. There was a lull in the conversation at the table when my then 4 year old son looked straight into the boss' eyes and exclaimed, "You're a pompous windbag!"
With deep embarrassment, we quickly excused our son from the table to go out into the lobby with our older daughter and the next minute we hear the hostess scolding loudly "NO, NO, NO!" I ran to see what was going on and found my son standing IN the water fountain near the hostess' desk, trying to get the change at the bottom of the fountain.
Thankfully, the boss had a sense of humor and the new job in the new state was safe. But he always liked to bring up the "windbag" story at company parties.
Re: Most embarrassing moment?
Board: Kid Shenanigans
Reply to: #657210 by LuLaHe
Nov 22, 2011 6:12pm
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In the airport-- flying solo with a 3yr old.

"Oh look mommy! You poo-pooed in the potty too! "
In all his 3year old excitement.
*clap*clap*clap*

We stayed in the stall for awhile.
Re: Most embarrassing moment?
Board: Kid Shenanigans
Reply to: #657210 by LuLaHe
Nov 22, 2011 7:44pm
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When my (now) oldest son was three, my Mother brought him home after a night at her house.
It was right after a Holiday(?) we up here in Buffalo call "Dyngus Day." Lots of goofy stuff, beer, squirt guns, pussy willows etc. My Mom always brought some of the pussy willows home with her and put them in a vase for what reason I don't know. My son had never seen or felt a pussy willow until then.

Grandma was getting his stuff out of the back of her car and he was already running up the driveway.

I'm outside in the driveway and my son is rambling with excitement. As soon as my Mother was within ear shot, all she heard was my son say;
"Grandma let me touch her woolly pussy. It was so soft."
Re: Most embarrassing moment?
Board: Kid Shenanigans
Reply to: #657210 by LuLaHe
Nov 22, 2011 9:27pm
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When we were potty training my youngest and still in pull-ups, we went on for a hike. We were walking along and she stops, in the middle of the trail, to do her business. About that same time a class of older students on a field trip walk up. I try to get her from the middle of the trail and she yell at me, "Mom! I'm trying to poop!" The whole class had to walk around her while she did what she had to do.
Re: Most embarrassing moment?
Board: Kid Shenanigans
Reply to: #657210 by LuLaHe
Nov 23, 2011 4:39am
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I was at the bank with my 4 and 6 year old, trying to clear something up with an account. It was the end of the summer and the girls seemed to have ants in their pants, restless and very little patiences. We were waiting in the lobby for the account manager to be done with another customer. It was finally our turn and we went into the glass walled office. My six year old sat in one chair and my four year old sat on my lap. We had just sat down and my six year old says "Ya know what?". What came out next was so mortifying, I didn't realize I had so many shades of red I could turn. The Manager of course says "What?". My DD says "My Dad farts in my face."

As we were leaving the Manager turned to my six year old and said "Thank you for making my day."
Re: Most embarrassing moment?
Board: Kid Shenanigans
Reply to: #657210 by LuLaHe
Nov 23, 2011 5:23am
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Only yesterday, I was at the post office (mailing postals, of course) and the two year old tornado was being too noisy, so I said, "Shhhhhh."

She screams

DON'T SHHHHHHH ME, WOMAN!

I have no idea where that came from. It may not have been my most embarrassing moment, they happen frequently, but it was my most recent.

Mamajama
Re: Most embarrassing moment?
Board: Kid Shenanigans
Reply to: #657210 by LuLaHe
Nov 23, 2011 7:38am
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Sorry, not my story (I have no kids) but friends of my in-laws.

They had been potty training their little boy and promised him ice cream and Toy Story underwear when he succeeded.

Big day arrives and the parents and boy walk into the ice cream store.

The boy looks at the clerk, points to his crotch and says, "Guess what I have in here!"

That's bad enough but then the boy continues. Did he have Buzz Lightyear underwear? Oh no.

"I have a Woody!"

The clerk gave the parents the diriest look!

KuKu
Re: Most embarrassing moment?
Board: Kid Shenanigans
Reply to: #657318 by KuKu
Nov 23, 2011 8:30am
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"The boy looks at the clerk, points to his crotch and says, "Guess what I have in here!"

That's bad enough but then the boy continues. Did he have Buzz Lightyear underwear? Oh no.

"I have a Woody!""

This truly made me laugh out load. That is so hysterical.
Re: Most embarrassing moment?
Board: Kid Shenanigans
Reply to: #657342 by The Groundhogs
Nov 23, 2011 9:30am
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You just can't make this stuff up!

KuKu
Re: Most embarrassing moment?
Board: Kid Shenanigans
Reply to: #657364 by KuKu
Nov 23, 2011 10:00am
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My coworker has a similar story. His son is now in college. When he was potty training, they bought him the Toy Story underwear as a reward for when he stopped using diapers. His dad was away on business and mom & son made the switch. They went to the airport to pick dad up (and this is back in the day when you could walk up to the gate to meet the arrivals.) He is walking off the plane and his son runs up to him, pulling his pants down yelling "Daddy, look at my Woody!"
Re: Most embarrassing moment?
Board: Kid Shenanigans
Reply to: #657364 by KuKu
Nov 23, 2011 10:06am
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Speaking of (not) making stuff up. My 16 year old daughter had a friend who is a boy (also 16) that she's been talking about letterboxing to. He's since been interested in starting to box with us. Here's what I can remember of the conversation about carving him a siggy stamp:

me to B (the boy): You'll have to figure out an image we can carve into a signature stamp for you and come up with a trail name to use."

B: "Ok. I love the minions from Despicable Me, maybe that."

M (my daughter): That could be your trail name too...Minion." *evil laughter followed*

They continued to throw around trail name and stamp ideas when my daughter turns to me and says with the most innocent look/voice:

M: "Mom, you'll give him rubber right?"

B & I looked at each other, then at her and she realized what she had just said and turned 12 shades of red and we all started laughing.

Gotta love it!

IrishInks
Re: Most embarrassing moment?
Board: Kid Shenanigans
Reply to: #657210 by LuLaHe
Nov 24, 2011 4:38am
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Several years ago, early in my training as a play therapist, I was doing a session with a 4 year old boy and his father. Being that toileting had become a regular part of my workday, I was always on the lookout for signs that pooping and peeing were imminent. Dad was sitting quietly in the corner while "Henry" and I interacted. I noticed that Henry kept pulling on his pants, and thinking that he might need to use the restroom I asked, "Henry, do you have to go pee?" to which he replied "No. My penis is hard. Feel it!".
Re: Most embarrassing moment?
Board: Kid Shenanigans
Reply to: #657264 by Mello Bunny
Nov 24, 2011 11:36am
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I told my daughter, now 10, about this thread, she just hung her head in shame. When I told her which story I shared she was almost as embarrassed as I was when it first happened. So at least I got that.
Re: Most embarrassing moment?
Board: Kid Shenanigans
Reply to: #657670 by Mello Bunny
Nov 25, 2011 4:14am
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Important lesson for her here--"what goes around, comes around." Can't learn that too soon in life!
Re: Most embarrassing moment?
Board: Kid Shenanigans
Reply to: #657210 by LuLaHe
Nov 27, 2011 10:21pm
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Alright- I had to wait until I was back in town to type this one out! (Keep reading, I promise it's not actually smutty!):

When one of the boys (who shall remain nameless!) was around 3-ish (maybe a tad younger) he and Obi-Mon Keynobi and I went out to dinner. We were getting ready to leave and Obi-Mon took kid to use the restroom. I was gathering our things when Obi-Mon comes bolting out of the restroom, totally redfaced, carrying kid and saying "We're leaving NOW!"
I looked puzzled, but Obi-Mon just said "Keep moving, I'll tell you when we get to the car."
When we were in the car, he told me that in the restroom, kid had pointed to a man standing at the urinal and loudly proclaimed "that man has a really big dick!"
I was pretty stunned, since I was almost positive kid had never heard that word in reference to the male anatomy, and told Obi-Mon that. To which he replied "well, he must have heard it somewhere!"
I remained perplexed, so I asked kid, "What did the man in the bathroom have?"
He replied "A really big dick"
(okay, breathe! There must be some explanation!)
So I aksed "Was he going potty?"
He replied "Yeah, but the dick was in his mouf"
(breathe again)
"Um, it was in his mouth?"
"Uh-huh"
(I've got to get to the bottom of this!)
"What did it look like"
"It had dat red curly stuff on da end"
(thinking hard)
"OH! You mean like the STICK that came with Mommy's sandwich?"
"Yeah! A big 'dick like dat one!"

Now I can't see one of those toothpicks with the curly cellophane on top without laughing!
Re: Most embarrassing moment?
Board: Kid Shenanigans
Reply to: #658429 by Monkeys!
Nov 28, 2011 9:06am
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OH MY! That's funny stuff there!!!
Re: Most embarrassing moment?
Board: Kid Shenanigans
Reply to: #658429 by Monkeys!
Aug 18, 2012 11:22pm
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I just read this now because it came up on Wassa's widget of funnies.

Seriously? This is one of the funniest things I've EVER heard :D
Re: Most embarrassing moment?
Board: Kid Shenanigans
Reply to: #657210 by LuLaHe
Aug 22, 2012 12:43pm
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The most embarrassing moment for my mother was when she was talking on the phone to one of my teachers who had called early in the morning. She was sitting up in bed when my father decided to potpourri the air with his morning hello. My mother was mortified. My teacher actually stopped talking and said "um..." My mother smacking my Dad tried to continue the conversation as if nothing had ever happened. She was never able to talk to that teacher ever again.

I am laughing, tears streaming down my cheeks thinking of this mortifying moment for my mom.
Re: Most embarrassing moment?
Board: Kid Shenanigans
Reply to: #724695 by TheBuckeyes4
Aug 26, 2012 5:32am
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Once when my daughter was maybe 3 or 4, I was getting ready to go "out". Being a mechanic, and never able to grow nails, I usually just buy the glue-ons. My daughter asked me if she could get some, and I absently said "sure, when you're older". When I dropped her off at her father's house, her greeting to him when he opened the door was "Hi Daddy, guess what?! Mama said when I get older I can wear FALSIES!!" I thought we were going to have to peel him off the ceiling! The look on his face was priceless!
Then, another moment with my dear little one, we were driving down the road, neither of us saying much, when all of a sudden, my daughter pipes up with "Mommy, what is oral sex?!" (Talk about almost running in a ditch!) I asked her where she had heard it mentioned, and she said she heard it on CNN. (Oh brother) Not knowing what to say, especially at 65 mph down the interstate, I simply said it was when people talk about sex. Remembering her father's reaction to her falsie statement I had to restrain myself from suggesting she ask her father....he would have certainly provided another Kodak moment!
Re: Most embarrassing moment?
Board: Kid Shenanigans
Reply to: #657298 by honig603
Jun 16, 2015 11:47pm
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OMG. I just saw this thanks to the Wassa widget, and not only can I so see her saying this, but with a straight face too.

You may not see it now, but you have two amazing kiddos there. You'll be laughing alot in the nursing home, and even the craziest of "inmates" will think you're completely off your rocker.

I can only dream of such a final chapter...

;)